Crazy

Hey baby girls,

You prolly think this post is about how crazy I'm going, and yes in a way.. It is. Your daddy and I have started working out and trying to eat better. I'm not saying we are perfect at it, but it is a start. I went outside to cool down and a song I really love came on and I just went crazy dancing outside. It's freezing out but I just didn't want to go inside. I just kept spinning and running around. If the neighbors were looking outside I probably look like I belonged in the crazy ward. If you were watching me, I'm sure you were both laughing at me, I hope you were. Sometimes I'm so worried that all you see is sadness and worries and pain, and I am sorry for that. I'm trying to be ok, but each day brings a new struggle, and new pain.

I just miss you both so much, I really really do. I can hold it inside , just for me to feel by myself a lot, but sometimes It's too much, and It comes out..

My dear girls, please always remember how much I love you, how much I need you, how much you girls mean to me. Your truly are my everything's, , my life, my heart.
I miss you very very much.

Goodnight love bugs, xoxo mommy

" I'll love you forever
 Ill like you for always
As long as I'm living
My babies you'll be.."